There are five key skills that you need to master in order to raise your emotional intelligence and manage stress.
Realize when you’re stressed,
recognize your particular stress response, and become familiar with
sensual cues and activities that can rapidly calm and energize you. The best way to
reduce stress quickly is through the senses: through sight, sound,
smell, taste, and touch. But each person responds differently to sensory
input, so you need to find things that are soothing to you (i.e taking a cozy bath.)
Stay connected to your internal emotional experience
so you can appropriately manage your own emotions. Your
moment-to-moment emotions influence your thoughts and actions, so pay
attention to your feelings and factor them into your decisions. If you ignore your emotions you won’t be able to fully understand
your own motivations and needs, or to communicate effectively with
others.
Recognize and effectively use nonverbal cues and body language.
In many cases, what we say is
less important than how we say it or the other nonverbal signals we send
out, such as eye contact, facial expression, tone of voice, posture,
gesture and touch. Your nonverbal messages can either produce a sense of
interest, trust, and desire for connection–or they can generate
confusion, distrust, and stress. You also need to be able to accurately
read and respond to the nonverbal cues that other people send you at
work.
Develop the capacity to meet challenges with humor.
There is no better stress buster than a hearty laugh and nothing
reduces stress quicker than mutually shared humor. But,
if the laugh is at someone else’s expense, you may end up with more
rather than less stress.
Resolve conflict positively.
Resolving conflict in healthy,
constructive ways can strengthen trust between people and relieve stress and tension. When handling emotionally-charged
situations, stay focused in the present by disregarding old hurts and
resentments, connect with your emotions, and hear both the words and the
nonverbal cues being used. If a conflict can’t be resolved, choose to
end the argument, even if you still disagree.
